Dating your yoga instructor, commute-crush, Tinder-bae and that guy/gal you just met at the bar may sound like fun but it’s actually a logistical nightmare. Plus, if you don’t communicate like an overblown Ted talker then some feelings are bound to get hurt – yours included. And whilst most of us consider ourselves lucky to attract the interest of one romantic party (let alone multiple), this just means that if and when the situation arises, we are woefully unprepared.
Enter: Reddit’s latest AskMen masterpiece: “New to dating. What’s the etiquette on dating multiple women at once?” In this thread, the internet forum’s 1.1 million-strong community weigh in – upvoting and downvoting the smartest responses – to bring us the ultimate guide to dating multiple people at once.
At what point are you assumed exclusive? When should you ask if they are seeing other people? How do you tell a long lusted after friend that you just don’t think it’s going to work? Wonder no more: this is the etiquette to getting freaky without getting freaked out on.
“Essentially, I’ve been on a 1st date with 2 different women. They both went very well. I know this may seem like a stupid question to some of you, but can I date them both for now? Obviously after 1 date it’s nothing serious, but I’ve genuinely never been in this position and don’t want to f*** up haha.”
It’s Fine To Be ‘Seeing’ Multiple People At Once
One Redditor sums it up perfectly: “If exclusivity hasn’t been discussed, it’s generally okay to be dating multiple people… up until a certain point. For example, if you’re only like a few dates in with the girls you’re talking to, then no harm no foul (the girls are probably talking to other guys too).”
But You Shouldn’t ‘Seriously Date’ Multiple Partners At Once (Unless They Know About It)
“HOWEVER,” the same Redditor continued, “If you’re doing ‘coupley’ things with a girl like staying the night, spending extended periods of time together, meeting her friends, etc then you should either stop talking to the other girls or make it very clear that you’re talking to other people.”